Opening Segment #1:
'The Plague Doctor'
 
Wednesday, April 8, 2009

Is capitalism making its return just in time for spring?
Cramer’s taking a look...


Jim:
   
  For the 1000th time, I am Cramer and welcome to Cramerica… welcome to Mad Money… the loyal Cramericans at home and all of these wonderful folks who came in from all across the United States to help us celebrate this huge milestone on Mad Money.

Why is this night different from all other nights… because this is the 1000th night of Mad Money… that is right 1000 shows… and I have yet to have a heart attack on air… at least not one that couldn’t be dealt with using the defibrillator I have under the desk… we want to thank everyone in America for making us this the number 1 business entertainment on earth… but, of course, it is the only one on earth… so are the comparisons as we say on Wall Street, are pretty easy… 1000 nights of me coming out here to help you understand what the market is doing and to help you be a better investor… and on that score, tonight is no different… to get the market to work its way higher as it did today, we need companies to blink… today we had a lot of blinking… and we see what happens, we get higher prices who blink...

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Continued below...


  

 

Market Results today:

Dow:  + 47

Nasdaq:  + 29

S&P 500:  + 9

 

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Wednesday, April 8, 2009
(Cont'd from above)...

 

 

 

 

Jim (cont'd):   

How about Centex, a Texas homebuilder, they blinked… this strong willed company gave up… just capitulated right into the arms of Pulte Homes… which we are absolutely thrilled about… the result… less capacity, fewer homes being built, less supply coming on… insuring my one time completely and totally ridiculous… massively ridiculous call… that all the real estate people in the audience will love… that the bottom in housing is indeed coming this summer.

Do you know what is happening… it is called capitalism… and it looks like it is springing up all over the place… take a look at Bed Bath & Beyond… up $6.17 today… why because Linens & Things, its principle competitor, didn’t just blink… it had its eyes poked out… again capitalism at work… just like we saw with the collapse of Best Buy’s principal competitor Circuit City… which has that stock on the move higher again… yesterday we saw Brinker, you know it as Chili’s, pre-announced a better than expected number on top of Darden, home of Red Lobster and Cramer fave Olive Garden, where my name still means nothing and I still have to wait a half hour no matter what I do… that is okay, I am alright with that… because many chains with too much debt are folding up their doors… giving you fewer choices to eat and drink at… even one time Cramer fave Ruby Tuesday, excellent salad bar, got in the act with good numbers today.

But can you take advantage of this… you should be able to… but not if you are making mistakes… not if you are being driven out of the game by those mistakes…not if you are clubbing yourself worse than Clubber laid into Rocky… in that first key match up, the one where Clubber, played more than adequately by Cramer fave Mr. T, predicted pain…. and I am predicting pain if you are playing… so on this very special night I am going to help you overcome the 10 plaques… the 10 plaques that inflict all retail investors… every kind of self inflicted pestilence that keeps you from making money… I can prevent you from hurting your portfolio… because as a grizzled 64 year old veteran of the markets… okay, today I reveal that I am actually 54... as well as the dynamite exodus from Egypt… a couple of eons ago… I know where you go wrong… I have made all of the mistakes that you are likely to make… and I have learned from them… so let my pain be your gain.

So what exactly are these 10 plaques…

First, there is the plaque of digging in your heels when the facts have changed…. this one is worse than a plaque of locusts… sometimes you are going to be wrong, when that happens it is natural to insist that you are right… that the topic is somehow open for debate… sometimes the issues just close and you have to be willing to be flexible and move on… all of the bears who say that they huge rally in March was a mistake… well, they have no idea how bad things will get… they are victims of this plaque… they missed a 20% move… hey, that is the equivalent of a bull market in one month…

Second plaque, thinking that you should always be fully invested… meaning your whole portfolio should be in stocks with nothing in cash… I can’t tell you how much money this plaque has caused people to lose… it is okay to be in cash… in fact, you should always have some cash on the sidelines… there are times, like when I went on “The Today” show on October 6th with the Dow above 10,000 and told you to sell, sell, sell… when you should have almost everything in cash… the idea that you have to be in stocks all of the time is a skurge.

Plaque number three, buying into stock snobbery… that is the now wide spread believe that it is impossible to beat the market… an individual investor should give up.. .they should only invest in index funds that try to mimic the market… this is the conventional wisdom spouted by pundits galore, and tenured academics… who by the way do not know the difference between buy and sell orders… and have never managed money in their lives… talk about another whole group that is going to love me after tonight… I am living proof that you can consistently beat the market… but I can tell you it is impossible if you give up before you even begin.

Fourth plaque that affects you home gamers… you let despair blind you to opportunity… at the beginning of March when we were at Dow 6,500... hardly anyone thought things could get better… the despair was so palpable… but that is precisely why it was the perfect chance to be opportunistic… and to buy some undamaged merchandise… and why we say there was limited downside, so you should ignore the perma-bear professors who say that we should lose a 1000 more points pronto… perma-bear professors join Mary Ann… Gilligan’s Island.

Alright, the fifth plaque… it is one that blows a lot of people out of the market… it is not being prepared for your losses… so you give up when they inevitably happen… that is right, losing money is inevitable… but it is not a reason to give up or feel discouraged… you have to steel yourself so it does not rattle you… consider them the boils… one of the most benign of the ten plaques.

Number six, another rain of frogs… it is the desire to let your gains rot… nobody wants to sell a winner but you are being greedy… if you don’t take profits when you have them, you may not have any profits at all… bulls make money, bears make money, hogs get slaughtered.

The seventh plaque is a bad one… you want to sell your stock at the exact top and buy them at the exact bottom… that is never going to happen… I call that arrogance… arrogance to believe that you can… that is why I tell you to buy in increments, that way if you buy a stock and it goes down, which I think it will mostly do, in this market if you don’t get it right… you can just buy more instead of tearing out all of your hair and crying yourself to sleep on the dirty linoleum floor as the locusts pick out your eyes and you drink cheap scotch.

Number eight, that is when you allow yourself to be seduced by stocks that are extensively cheap… either single digit stocks or stocks with very little price to earnings multiples… and you think, how much downside can there be… stocks don’t trade below $10 for no reason… you downside can always be 100%.

The ninth self inflicted plaque is being to credulous… excepting everything you hear from your broker or from money managers or CEO’s on TV at face value… it seems easier to let someone else tell you what to do these days… but these people have agendas… and you are better off doing your own homework… now this plaque has victimized yours truly, and I admit it… because you must own your mistakes if you are going to learn from them… and sometimes, you have to shame yourself… Wachovia Bank post-it.

Finally, the worst plaque, the one that is equivalent of killing your first portfolio… and not even a Lambshank could save you… the plaque of buy and hold… and ideology that is this shows eternal nemesis… the notion that you can just buy a few good looking stocks and you can hold onto them forever… and somehow you will make money… this is total hogwash… but lots of people, extensively guys who are experts and 100% of the provocerian/intellectensia tell you it is right… in order to keep you in your stock chains… it is a tempting philosophy because it lets you be lazy… but this is not a lazy man’s game… investing is only for those who are willing to do homework… just ask the people who bought and held Lehman Brothers.

Here is the bottom line…

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The Bottom Line!:     If you want to take advantage of the outbreak in capitalism in the economy that is allowing the winners now to go higher… you have to avoid the 10 plaques… the 10 plaques of retail investing… if you can avoid inflicting them on yourself… you will have a much easier time trying to make money… and certainly not losing it... Avoiding Cramer’s 10 plaques of investing could help your portfolio go higher...   Alright, remember to avoid the 10 deadly investor plaques… how about this… Mazaltov for a 1000 Mad Money shows.

 

[verbatim recap]

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Jim went on after this segment to take questions from callers, and responded with his comments...

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Q:    Last week, I was able to get
Celgene Corporation (CELG*) at $38, and thank you I got that from the action alert. And now I am interested in Gilead Sciences Inc. (GILD*), and I wondered what price would be good to get that?

Jim:   
I think you could buy Gilead today… you know, there was an article in the Journal today I thought Gilead would be up.. the Journal article said that AIDS awareness is going to be something that the President is going to pursue… if you know, unfortunately if you are HIV positive, there is a Gilead treatment… I thought that it would send the stock up… the bio-tech stocks today were weak… I think Gilead, now it is up 2 points from where they just had that terrific announcement about the heart failure drug that no one else has, for last resort… so maybe you think the stock is 2 and therefore has to rest… I would pull the trigger right here… I like Gilead at $47.

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Q:    You have recommended some private education stocks recently, and with unemployment rising and with people have lost their jobs are going out and learning new skills. Since there haven’t been too many IPO’s in 2008 and 2009, what do you think of Rosetta Stone going public next week?

Jim:   
No, I don’t want you… now look, we used to say at my old hedge fund, the pump is primed… they are going to make that deal work… they are going to make that deal work because there has been so few IPO’s that they are going to price it at a price that I think you should try to get in… on the offering price… don’t pay, you know there are two prices… there is the offering price where you can get in as part of the deal… and then there is where the stock opens up… if you pay where the stock opens, I don’t like it… because I don’t think you will make money… and remember, that group after
Apollo Group Inc. (APOL) reported its quarter, it has been all down hill… we recommended to sell Apollo about 18% ago… we recommended to sell Strayer Education roughly about 20% ago… the only one that we still like is American Public Education Inc. (APEI), we are taking some profits there because we are being too greedy… but if you can get in on the deal, I approve of it.

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[verbatim recap]

[end of segment]

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